Lab Tested Serialisation – Episode 10

 Family Guy

From the top of the staircase I can hear Wilfred laughing; it’s infectious, of course, as is any child’s laughter, but just how his mirth arouses suspicion in me is that it is the kind of giggle most parents refer to as wicked laughter. He’s up to something, no doubt… Slowly, I creep down the stairs and make my way to the kitchen doorway, each step placed carefully in a bid not to disturb him. I know my son and I know this particular sound; he is definitely up to something and I think I know what.

Looking through the kitchen to the sofa at the far end, I am unsurprised by the sight I see before me; Dudley, so often the protagonist in these monologues, now finally finds himself on the receiving end of some unwanted juvenile attention. He is dressed in what appears to be at least a dozen muslin cloths and is sporting a well balanced blue stacking cup atop his head. Piled up high around his base like driven snow against a hedgerow lies a Peppa Pig camper van, a dozen of the aforementioned figurines and the remainder of the stacking cups – seven in all. There is one further addition to Dudley’s collection of sundry items only this one is neither plastic nor cloth – it is human. Done with mischief for now at least, Wilfred has snuggled amongst the debris for a cuddle with his fur brother.

Eventually my presence at the doorway is noticed though the only reaction it elicits is a single flick of Dudley’s tail – a staple communication piece in the lexicon of all Labradors and one that indicates he’s still at peace with the world, if not a trifle inconvenienced by attentions of his human sidekick. Just then the silence is punctured as he moves, toppling the blue plastic beaker and triggering the sound effect in an Iggle Piggle doll that has somehow worked its way underneath his backside. Most appropriately, this doll only says one phrase – “best friends”.  

I hope you enjoyed this final snippet from Lab Tested. If you did and would like to read the book in its entirety, you can find it on…you guessed it, Amazon, in both print and Kindle form. Thanks for stopping by.